But I'd still need to try.

Frankly speaking. Family 2 sucks to the core. We were lousy during LINE camp, & now CDAYL comes everybody still sucks to the core.

I have the very urge to back out of CDAYL.

It's super annoying. Family 2 doesn't make me feel at ease. Everyone practically ignores me. Except for og10 people, like fiona and stuff, whom I know are there to chat with me.

I really dislike family 2. Really no kidding. You can hear from many I practically whined my whole evening away.

When I looked over & see the other families, they're either practicing their family dance, playing ice-breakers & just basically fooling around having loads of fun.

What does family 2 have? Nothing man we're all dispersed once the briefing is over. There is no bond, there is no spirit, there is no nothing, just the let's-get-this-over-with attitude which really made me feel super fucked up.

I completely played wrongly at my own game making pearlyn as the LGI/C. Things are going to turn much sour. I can see she doesn't like me, yet I still had to try to pretend. Which I think is very disgusting & everything against my morales.


The way I see shenn with her crew & me with mine, are completely different things. & I hate this really sour feeling.

--
After the whole CDAYL briefing, and dispersing and stuff, Leon, christopher, cheanfei & co are left to roam because we had to wait for the other members.

Shenn & I & some others went to the grand stand to admire the sunset.

Wasn't exactly that much of a pretty sight, but enough to last the few minutes away back then,

When I don't have to give a damn about my worries,
I don't have to give a damn about how I'm falling back with my schoolwork,
I don't have to give a damn about how I realise people around me are starting to feel annoyed,
I don't have to give a damn about how my absence had let to people thinking I don't care anymore,
I don't have to give a damn about how tired I am,
I don't have to give a damn about how many commitments I'm stressing myself with once JC life started,

I don't have to give a damn about anything.
I just observed the clouds, as the sky turned darker and darker.

A moment like this is hard to remember,
But with a lifestyle like this, you'd definitely appreciate the relaxed feeling.


The trip back home, seriously I wasn't feeling emo.
I was just very tired,
Of trying my best to think of ways to make family 2 bond.

At least I'm trying.
Most of the people just don't give a damn, sadly.